Broken to Brave | Guiding you to heal & break free from anxiety

Finding Serenity Amidst High Performance

• Dr. Stephanie Lopez • Episode 66

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Do you excel at work but feel constantly worried on the inside? Join me in this episode to explore the hidden world of high-functioning anxiety. I reveal the telltale signs, discuss its impact on various aspects of life, and introduce a powerful three-pillar approach to break free from its grip. Whether you're a perfectionist, a chronic overthinker, or simply curious about managing anxiety while maintaining success, I'm offering practical solutions to help you thrive without the constant worry.

In this episode, I cover the following:
1. Definition of high-functioning anxiety, its signs and symptoms.
2. Impact of high-functioning anxiety on work, relationships, and health.
3. Three pillars to overcome high-functioning anxiety.

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💗 Dr. Steph
@DrStephanieLopez
www.brave-method.com




Speaker 1:

I'm Dr Steph and I want you to know that you do not have to suffer from anxiety or explosive emotional reactions like lashing out. You are not, in fact, broken and I'm going to show you how to have the ultimate control over your reactions so that you are unstoppable. Welcome to the Broken to Brave podcast. Welcome back, oh, my goodness, thank you for tuning in to another episode of the Broken to Brave podcast. If you have kids, I hope that the school year is off to a great start so far, and if you live somewhere where maybe it's colder climate and your kids have not started yet, I hope the tail end of your summer is going well. I have a question for you Do you struggle with high functioning anxiety? Today, I'm going to dive into the telltale signs that you may be struggling with high functioning anxiety, the impact that it may be having on you and exactly what you need to do to break free. Before I dive into that, I'm just going to give a very quick update. On the day of this recording, we are 10 days out from the next transfer for SeroBabe. If you're new here, I am on a surrogacy journey and the first transfer resulted in a miscarriage an early miscarriage and we are trying again. It's been almost three months and it feels like eternity. So I'm really really looking forward to it and hoping for the best, just really really hoping that this one develops into a healthy pregnancy. If you pray, please send us prayers, send good vibes, good wishes, all the things. I appreciate you. Thank you for being here. Now let's go ahead and dive in.

Speaker 1:

What is high-functioning anxiety Really describes people who experience anxiety, but they are still able to perform well in their day-to-day lives. So on the outside they appear successful, organized, put together, but internally it's a whole nother story. They're struggling with constant worry, self-doubt stress, and this was me for decades, decades. I worried every single day. I had so much anxiety, but I was still doing the things, but it felt awful because my insides did not match my outsides and I didn't like that. And I'm guessing if you have this struggle as well, you don't like that either, like having to pretend and not really being able to show up as who you are.

Speaker 1:

Here's the paradox, the very traits that make you appear successful if you're struggling with high functioning anxiety. The perfectionism, the attention to detail, the strong work ethic those are driven by your anxiety. What if you could have all the success you want without the anxiety. What would that be worth to you? What would that be worth to you? Now? While these traits can lead to success, they also come at a cost, and that's what I want to dive into today. So let's talk about some telltale signs and symptoms of high functioning anxiety.

Speaker 1:

If you struggle with high functioning anxiety, you may often set extremely high standards for yourself, over-prepare for tasks, double-check your work obsessively. You may also fear making mistakes. As I go through these I want you to think about is this me? Can I relate to this? Like, how much of this is the way that I'm actually showing up in the world? Another sign is just constant worry and overthinking. So, even when everything seems fine, you may feel plagued by all of the what if? Thoughts. What if this happens? What if this comes back? What if this person says says X, y, z? And this constant worry can lead to overthinking even the smallest decisions.

Speaker 1:

Next one is restlessness and trouble relaxing. So it may be hard for you to sit still or fully relax, and there's just this persistent feeling of needing to be productive, even during downtime that you have set aside, that you know like this is time that I'm not going to work. You may still be experiencing that pull that you've got to be productive, you've got to get something done. You may also struggle with people pleasing and fear of failure. So you may go out of your way to please other people, saying yes to everything even when you want to say no. How many times have you done that? How many times have you said yes even when you want to say no, and have you thought about okay, why am I doing this? You may know immediately Fear of disappointing someone, fear of failing. What if we could get rid of that fear so you could honor yourself and say no when you want to say no? Sign is physically so.

Speaker 1:

High functioning anxiety can manifest in muscle tension on the shoulders, for example, headaches, fatigue, difficulty sleeping. Which of these resonate most with you? Which of these can you relate to? When I was struggling with high functioning anxiety, I honestly could relate to every single one of these. So if you're sitting there and you're like Steph, all of them, that's okay. No worries at all. This is not just the way that you are. If you resonate with these struggles, you know this is impacting your life. You know it is, but have you paused long enough to really think it through. How much is this impacting you and do you want to continue operating that way? Do you want to continue showing up that way? If you continue to accept this as the norm for yourself, as just the way you are, it will continue impacting your work, your relationships, your health not just your mental health, but your physical health too and it will keep you stuck. Why, if you accept this is just the way that I am, your mind will put no effort in trying to be any different.

Speaker 1:

Let's talk about some of the specific impacts. If you think about work or your career, it can lead to professional success because there is that perfectionism, that attention to detail, that organization, that drive and like constant productivity and like constant productivity. But at the same time, it is fueled by fear of failure, of all of the negative, like the what ifs, and this often results in burnout. It results in working so many hours that you're just suppressing and numbing everything else. You're not living in the moment and when you really slow down and think about it, you don't have work-life balance.

Speaker 1:

Obviously, there's an impact on relationships too. You may appear confident, you know, but you may also, on the inside, be struggling with self-doubt, with fear of rejection, and that can strain relationships, because your mind can go crazy thinking about oh my gosh, what are they going to think about me? What are they going to say? Can I say no when I want to? All of these questions making it so that there's disconnection in the relationships rather than connection in the relationships rather than connection. You may also avoid having hard conversations that honestly should be had, so that you're honoring yourself or you may overcommit in order to let other people down, and it doesn't have to be like that.

Speaker 1:

Other impacts are on mental and physical health. Being under a position where you're chronically stressed and chronically worried can lead to physical issues, big physical issues, hypertension, digestive problems and weakened immune system. Mentally, it can also contribute to those feelings of overwhelm, exhaustion, even depression. Right, it's easy to gloss over these things, but there are real negative impacts that you can overcome with relative ease. It doesn't have to be like, oh my gosh, I've got to go to therapy for all these years to get this tackled and then you barely see any changes. No, I don't want you to accept that. I don't want you to listen to this and to think like, okay, yeah, I do have these struggles, but this is just the way that I am, because if you do, this will continue to be your struggle, and it doesn't have to.

Speaker 1:

There's a simple method to break free from high function and anxiety, and it comes down to three pillars. All you need to do is embody the three pillars and you will be free. What are they, you might be asking Analyze data, activate choice and absolute acceptance. And here's what you need to know you need all three of them. If you're missing one or two of them, you will continue to stay stuck.

Speaker 1:

When you combine activate choice and absolute acceptance, what's going to happen for you is you will feel unfazed by mistakes. Can you imagine that, embodying the truth that to make mistakes is to be human, and then feel free from overthinking, and embody the truth that, no matter what happens, you can not only cope but actually thrive in situations that you used to think were difficult or challenging. You trust yourself and your automatic response to relaxation and downtime shifts so that you're able to fully relax and recharge. But when analyzed data is missing? Because, again, that was just if you combine activate choice and absolute acceptance, so if analyzed data is missing, you're not addressing the root cause of the triggers, and so you will still be controlled by them, because it's essentially putting a band-aid on the situation, and the band-aid only lasts so long. You may find yourself blaming other people or blaming circumstances on why you feel the way you do, and when you're in that mode, you're not empowering yourself.

Speaker 1:

When you combine absolute acceptance and analyze data, what happens is your anxiety. Any rage or anger rumination will decrease. Situations that previously caused you to feel stress won't phase you the way that they did before. I got to tell you. Every single time a client tells me this like this used to stress me out so much and I feel calm as can be. Now I light up because people do not think that's possible. You'll feel happier and calmer just overall.

Speaker 1:

But even though you have those two combined so that's absolute acceptance and analyze data combined when you're missing activate choice, you'll feel stuck. You won't understand, like, how do I actually change the things that I want to in myself? And you may find yourself saying that you want to feel different, but you can't stop feeling that way. However, when you combine analyze data and activate choice, your insecurities no longer control you and they no longer control what you do. Think about this. How many times have you not done something because there was an insecurity there, like what are they going to think? Am I going to look stupid? Am I just going to be ignored? Am I going to be judged? You will feel in control of your triggers rather than being controlled by them.

Speaker 1:

But if you just have those two and you're missing absolute acceptance, you'll find yourself thinking or saying things you know this shouldn't be happening, that shouldn't be happening, or it's always something. It's one thing after another. Have you felt that way before? Yeah, you'll feel more stressed. You'll probably beat yourself up more. You'll push yourself like oh, I just got to push myself to do better, to get more done. I'm just not getting it done fast enough and you may feel stuck in perfectionism. That makes the changes that you want feel hard, and it doesn't have to feel hard. But when you have all three of those combined together, you get this beautiful effect where you break free from high functioning anxiety and the related problems.

Speaker 1:

Think about all the things that I spoke about on this episode. If you're experiencing one or more of those problems, I guarantee that you're missing at least one of the three pillars that I just went over. But here's what I'm super excited about is inside Brave Academy. What I do is I guide you to embody all three of the pillars so that you no longer struggle with anxiety or high functioning anxiety or those related symptoms like perfectionism, people pleasing, inability to rest, and you can experience all the benefits of feeling free from it all.

Speaker 1:

All you need to do is send me a DM with the word academy and I'll let you know. We'll talk, have a no pressure conversation. I'll let you know if you're a good fit for the program or not. Thank you so much for listening today. I will see you next week. Thank you so much for listening today. Are you ready to finally heal and break free from anxiety, including symptoms like replaying interactions, fearing making mistakes, imagining worst case scenarios and constant worrying? If so, dm me the word free on Instagram at Dr Stephanie Lopez and I will send you a link to my completely free class to officially ditch anxiety.

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Dr. Stephanie Lopez

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