Have you ever wrestled with the tug-of-war between success and fulfillment, or pondered the profound role intuition may play in your life? This episode is poised to offer you some much-needed insights. We sit down with the ever-insightful Angelica Ray, who opens up about her unique journey of personal growth, awakening, and spiritual discovery.
Angelica emphasizes the importance of self-validation, urging you to trust your intuition and reference yourself rather than societal norms. We also explore the powerful concept of embodiment and how it can help clear mental, emotional, and energetic clutter. Furthermore, we delve into the transformative power of mentorship and the importance of community and support for women. This episode is a treasure trove of insights, wisdom, and guidance that could potentially transform your life. So, buckle up and join us on this enlightening journey with Angelica Ray.
In this episode, we talk about the following: 1. Acknowledging that the challenges and struggles we are facing are not a sign of personal failure. 2. Recognizing that the intensity of your struggles may be a signal to pay attention and make changes. 3. The importance of committing to the path of feeling and validating yourself.
Have you ever wrestled with the tug-of-war between success and fulfillment, or pondered the profound role intuition may play in your life? This episode is poised to offer you some much-needed insights. We sit down with the ever-insightful Angelica Ray, who opens up about her unique journey of personal growth, awakening, and spiritual discovery.
Angelica emphasizes the importance of self-validation, urging you to trust your intuition and reference yourself rather than societal norms. We also explore the powerful concept of embodiment and how it can help clear mental, emotional, and energetic clutter. Furthermore, we delve into the transformative power of mentorship and the importance of community and support for women. This episode is a treasure trove of insights, wisdom, and guidance that could potentially transform your life. So, buckle up and join us on this enlightening journey with Angelica Ray.
In this episode, we talk about the following: 1. Acknowledging that the challenges and struggles we are facing are not a sign of personal failure. 2. Recognizing that the intensity of your struggles may be a signal to pay attention and make changes. 3. The importance of committing to the path of feeling and validating yourself.
Hi, I'm Dr Steph and I'm here to guide you on your journey to healing from a difficult relationship with your mother, whether she was narcissistic, emotionally immature or just plain toxic. I want you to know that you are in fact, not broken and you do not have to suffer from anxiety or explosive emotional reactions like lashing out. You can break the cycle. You are a strong, capable woman who can handle any challenge that comes your way, and I'm going to show you how to have the ultimate control over your reactions so that you are unstoppable. Welcome to the Broken to Brave podcast. Welcome back everyone.
Speaker 1:
I am so excited for today. I have a special guest on, but before I introduce her, I wanted to let you know that this will be the last episode before the New Year. I'm taken two weeks off and not making myself do any podcast episodes, so enjoy today and I will see you in the New Year. Now I have Angelica Ray here with me today and I actually met her through someone else on Instagram. Of course, I feel like I introduced a lot of my guests. I'm like I found them on Instagram and she. I scheduled a session with her. I'll let her say what she does, but I scheduled a session with her and I got there and she's like oh, did you see the date and time? Today it's February 2nd 2022 at 2 pm. And I was like, whoa, that is so weird, because I had been seeing twos everywhere and I continued to see twos everywhere the entire year, so that was wild. Okay, without further ado, I'll go ahead and turn it to you so you can tell us a little bit about who you are.
Speaker 2:
Awesome. Well, thank you so much, dr Seth, for having me on, and I remember that coincidence will say or synchronicity of our first session and just feeling such an instant connection to you. So I'm grateful that our relationship has flourished in the year plus since. And hi to Dr Seth's beautiful community. My name is Angelica Ray. I am a multi hyphenate being and creative and multi passionate woman like many of you, but my work traditionally centers around the intersection of intuition, healing, personal growth and spirituality. So I serve in those capacities and also, like many of you, so much of my work is in flux as an end is evolving right now, so I even struggle with exactly how to introduce myself because the boxes that previously fit don't feel quite right anymore.
Speaker 1:
So I love the way that you introduced yourself. Perfect for me. Thank you, all right, so I would? I know we've talked a little bit about what life was like when you were younger, so I would love for you to share some of that today. If you think about just your personal development or inner work journey, what was your experience?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, oh man, it's been a long road. I will say that I grew up as a very naturally sensitive child and a very feeling person and as a result of a lot of the experiences I had growing up, I now understand that I honed my intuition and my ability to see and feel the unseen as a safety mechanism very early on, I mean it was a way to stay safe in social situations or even around my caretakers and navigating their emotions.
Speaker 2:
I had this kind of natural inclination towards intuition and obviously, being so young, I didn't necessarily know what to do with that or what that all meant, so it made for a very interesting experience, growing up feeling a lot, having lots of big sensations and not really knowing where to put them yeah, yeah. I went through. I mean I did the college thing, kind of matriculated, being a star student, a great performer and achiever. Dean's List 4.4.
Speaker 2:
Of course, and I'm speaking to this because I knew- so much of your audience and so much of your community, like relates so hey, I am also your people and you are my people, but did check all the boxes and still ultimately felt really unfulfilled, except for this kind of knowing that I was meant to teach. And I didn't know exactly what I was meant to teach. But I took that calling very literally. So I found myself working at one of the largest commercial banks in the country and, instead of hitting sales goals, as was required by us at the time, I was teaching financial literacy to basically anybody that would sit at my desk and really allowing them to story, tell their own experience and engage with them that way. Then I took the calling a bit more literally and moved from San Diego to Atlanta with Teach for America with the intention of teaching and oh, I got goosebumps, yeah.
Speaker 2:
So I was like, okay, this teacher thing, let's take this archetype seriously. And I worked in a high school for a really long time, for six years, and ultimately I think the spirit of service within me was very disillusioned by how how little we can do about some of the survival mechanisms, patterns, like so much of it is systemic and by the time kids make it to education, if they're not high school, I'll say if they're not really getting the full robust training, teaching wisdom about how to figure out who they are and what they want to do in the world, everything else is kind of a lot, I don't want to say a lost cause, but it can make it really challenging to do that. So I'll pause there and I'm curious if there's any questions that come up before I continue and share how I did this.
Speaker 1:
I was so zoned in I wasn't asking any questions, but I had a few pop up, or maybe it's just like me resonating first when you said you had a lot of big feelings, when little me too. And I don't know if you're going to resonate, I'm just curious. I'll share my experience. I felt like I got the messaging that I shouldn't be feeling so strongly and so many things, and I felt like something was wrong with me. And I always try to share that because I don't know how many other people felt that way too. But I figured I'd just chime in about that and see how that lands.
Speaker 2:
Absolutely. I definitely felt that Just. I mean, I was the kid that used to cry on the last day of school just because of the overwhelming feeling of change and emotion and even if the emotions were heightened and people were excited, just that deep sensation and people used to tell me all the time you're such a cry baby. So, yeah, it felt really wrong to have these big feelings but ultimately what I didn't have was the language to reference my own experience and for that internal world to be validated and that came from really interesting coping mechanisms or survival mechanisms as we move?
Speaker 1:
What happened for you when you say interesting?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I think I went into and this is probably a larger conversation that we can get to but for myself I compensated in two ways. I learned that when I learned that it wasn't safe to reference myself or that I didn't have language for referencing myself, my own needs, my own feelings, my own desires, I learned to reference in two places. I learned to reference other people so what did they want or expect or need out of me and how could I shape, shift to provide that so that I get the valid that I needed? Or I learned and this kind of came online a little bit later. I learned to reference this proverbial, abstract rulebook of how to be a good girl, how to do things right.
Speaker 1:
I'm tearing up, I'm like this just hits, it just lands.
Speaker 2:
Yes, yes, yeah so and I mean we'll get to it. But ultimately, having understood this now and this is a revelation that has really come online through my own work in the last couple of years I see this everywhere, like we are not alone.
Speaker 1:
No, we're not alone.
Speaker 2:
There's so much freedom to be garnered in healing these parts of ourselves.
Speaker 1:
Mm. Hmm, yes, I know why we clicked.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, I didn't expect to get a little teary-eyed with that. Oh my gosh. Okay, so yeah, you can say more about that. I also got excited when you said Teach for America. I was in a fraternity, like a co-ed fraternity in college and there was some connection with Teach for America. I'm actually blanking on it right now, but I was like, oh wow, I've heard of them, they do great work. But I can imagine how challenging it is to come in at the teenage years and try to make a difference when there's just a lot I mean a lot that I'm not even sure about, but a lot going on so much.
Speaker 2:
And it's funny. I often laugh because our soul chooses exactly what it needs to learn, you know, and sometimes we need to see those lessons repeatedly.
Speaker 2:
I kind of often joke that I needed to go back to high school to do it differently, to see it differently. And so spirit, God, whatever my soul chose to like, send me back to high school to do it all over again so I could have a different perspective. And that was really the catalyst for my own awakening. I was. What does it mean to, through my own lens, to feel purposeful, to know who I am, to show up in the world authentically and ultimately, in that own journey? What would happen if we could teach this at a younger age, Like we wouldn't have women like ourselves in our mid 30s, 40s, even 20s trying to figure out who we are?
Speaker 1:
Angelica that, oh my gosh. There's like so many things where I'm like, oh, we haven't talked about this before, but when I had like the moment that shifted everything for me, I was like I have to share this with as many parents and educators as possible, because I'm like I am going to fight this, but not really fight. But that's probably the attitude I had back then for both sides, and I'm going to change the world, man.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, and you have to. And it's interesting. I mean, you obviously have two daughters. You know young girls. I have a niece and I have a lot of friends that have children, and this generation of kids is not going for it, like they will not be what we were conditioned into. They just, their souls, just are not here for it. So we do need to have to wait for that, because they are like, no, like you guys really messed this thing up and I am not.
Speaker 1:
We're not here for listening to you or the rulebook yes, oh my gosh, I love that. I love that so much. Ok, so anything else when we look at like before, that experience for you teach, for America that shifted everything.
Speaker 2:
Anything else that you want to share about how you viewed the world, how you viewed yourself, just what your experience was so yeah, I'll say like I found myself in my office in this high school, not to mention just the energetic component of being in a space with that many humans who had that many big emotions of their own and no safety to put them so, just like the energetic of that environment.
Speaker 2:
But ultimately I found myself having a lot of anxiety attacks and I mean and I've never ever experienced in my life that level of anxiety and fear and overwhelm and deep sadness and I ultimately just like, made a choice that I was not going to live that way, and I got really curious.
Speaker 2:
I picked up every book. I woke up an hour earlier in the morning to read to journal. I listened to anything I could get my hands on in terms of a resource to support me and understanding what I was going through and help me find who I actually was and what I was meant to be doing, which I'll kind of connect the dots quickly here ultimately led me to some experiences that were undeniable in terms of my like a gifts and my intuitive abilities, and I was kind of nudged into using that gift. I was more intentionally in my work with people, and so I left school back in 2019. I did a little bit of overlap I ran my business and worked at the school for about a year, a year and a half. I left to do my work full time in 2019 and since then I've been working really one on one with people, offering reading and intuitive clarity sessions to help people feel the truth of their own self, their own experience, and gain clarity from that.
Speaker 1:
And that's how, dr Stephens yes, yes, I scheduled a 2022 reading and it was incredible. I'm just going to throw that in there. I think that was the first session like that that I had ever done before, so I went in really not knowing what to to expect, and it was fantastic. I referenced my notes from that, re listened to it multiple times and I'm just going to say because I'm sure some people listening and like, oh, psychic abilities, like I don't know about that the things that you shared with me ended up coming true, which to me, was wild. So the more I learned, the more open I am to seeing everything in the world, like versus, like what's right, what's wrong. And you mentioned the word curiosity and I think that is one of the most important ways to approach yourself Period To get curious and in the world, honestly, but to get curious about, okay, what's happening for me, what's going on. It's such an important lens that helps us learn so much more. So happy you mentioned that.
Speaker 2:
I love that idea of curiosity because it really opens the door for the breadcrumbs to be presented, and I believe that whatever higher power or organizing divine intelligence there is amongst us, once space to work with them through us, and curiosity is the doorway that allows that to happen. Yes, they were open. I think we're made by what books fall into our lap, what conversations we come across, what synchronicities, and two, two, two, two, two, two occur as a direction on our path.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. For when you said, like, what books fall into our laps? The moment that I mentioned earlier where I had, you know, basically my awakening, or that, that moment that shifted everything for me, it was just a training at NASA that fell into my lap. I didn't go in. They like, oh, this is going to change my life. A lot have gone down where I was like open to change and seeing that, like, okay, there's things that I want to work on and people are just like, oh, register for this program, register, so I did. And holy smokes. So when things seem to fall into your lap, roll with it. That's my two cents. Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:
I okay, oh, go ahead. I think that we're meant to evolve and I think whatever forces out there is conspiring to help us do that. So the more open we can be that process and if you're, if someone's listening to our conversation here, the likelihood is they're open to that process.
Speaker 1:
Yes, yes, I totally agree. Okay, so you were having an anxiety attacks. I'm like, okay, we need like to finish like, take, take us where you are now. You started reading everything you could get your hands on doing this work. You discovered like holy moly, this is what I meant to do. Okay, how like take us from there.
Speaker 2:
Yes. So, holy moly, this is what I meant to do and I have built. So what I'll say is I have made a life for myself, helping other people connect to their own intuition. Right, I've? Ultimately, I'm not. When someone comes to me, first of all, I'm not. I am predictive in nature in the work that I've done, but I'm. I try to steer away from that because, ultimately, everybody has free will. What's most important is that, in a sense, with me, somebody has an experience of the truth of their own soul and can feel themselves yes, which comes back to those of us who learned to reference other people or reference the rule book. And when a chance to feel and experience who she is, when her emotions are valid, when her own intuition is affirmed and seen and valued, that's when magic happens.
Speaker 1:
Yes, oh, my gosh, yeah, I resonate with that so deeply, like from well, now we've done several sessions, my brain more went to like oh, you told me this thing, and then it did happen. But you're right. Most of it was like seeing who I really am and what I'm capable of like during those sessions. And gosh, yeah, okay, just wanted to chime in there. And everything that you went through as a child to like set you up perfectly to serve in this way.
Speaker 2:
Yes, it really did, and I guess I want to tell the full story, which is you know, for a long time I was and have been serving in this capacity of sessions, one-on-one sessions, and what I came to see is the pattern that we just described, right, this pattern of this beautiful being, this high quote-on-quote achieving, but ultimately an awakening leader, whether she's a leader in her household, a leader in a in NASA a leader in you know, a classroom like.
Speaker 2:
Whatever the case is, the women that come to me are truly awakening leaders and they are naturally very intuitive beings either because, you know, some of the traumas that they've experienced have cultivated, cultivated that in them, or because it's a skill set they're meant to learn to use, and so that has really been, I guess, what I'm. What I'm wanting to say is the healing process in my own journey, and what I've witnessed happen with other people is the more that we get curious, ask questions, learn ourselves, the more we learn to reference the natural intuition that is seated within us to yeah, had to chime in there.
Speaker 2:
Yes, yes, yes yeah, and I know you've seen that in your own life. I've watched you really blossom and bloom as you learn to trust the voice of your own intuition and reference that as a guide hope mm-hmm, yep, yep.
Speaker 1:
And now I have. Whenever I have the experience of I didn't listen to my intuition, I don't beat myself up about it. I'm like, oh, this is just another reminder to tune in and to honor myself. Yes, I'm sharing that, so others can do that too. You don't have to beat yourself up, you can just like okay.
Speaker 2:
This is another reminder I needed yes, that's true, and like any good relationship, it is fostered by dialogue. Right, if I continuously go to a friend for you know, advice or support, and then basically discard everything that friend tells me, the chain of communication, the link of communication, is not going to be as strong as it is if I'm honoring what's there. And so the more that we listen to our intuition, the more that the intuition within us trusts that it is a reliable friend and guidepost, the more it will feel so.
Speaker 1:
It's a muscle that can be strengthened yes, I feel that like a hundred percent. That's been my experience. Yeah, so what else is coming up for you right now? Where are you now?
Speaker 2:
I mean, you shared a little bit about you, know more about what you do, how you view the world, just anything else coming up around there yeah, I maybe I've said this before, but I'll say it again I'm much less interested in for all of the reasons we've talked about intuitive reading right now, and I'm much more interested in helping women supporting awakening and emerging leaders heal those patterns of referencing other and referencing the rules and learning to reference themselves.
Speaker 2:
That is like the crux of my work right now, and there's some basic developmental skills that I never got that I had to kind of learn the hard way, as many of us did, and bump into a lot. But once the dots started clicking and these skillset started coming online and I learned how to feel enough on my own, how to have a measure for what is good enough, how to reference the full spectrum of my own sensation, that has been the catalyst. I'm happier than I've ever been in my life. I'm more fulfilled than I've ever been in my life, and I had a birthday a few months ago and I posted that. Like you know, a year ago my life looked very much the same as it does right now. I live in the same building, I drive the same car I like. On the surface it looks the same, but living it feels like a completely different person as a result of creating skillsets to love that, yeah, and your focus aligns so much with the work that I'm doing in a different way.
Speaker 1:
But how do we say F the rules and let go of all of the shoulds and do what you want, honor what you want and tap in, tap back into okay, what. What do? What am I feeling? What do I actually want to do? If nobody was telling me you should, if it, if there was no right way?
Speaker 2:
And that's so important because if we look at, look around at the world, and it's like these rule books haven't really gotten us very far. You know, like, who made the rules and and what? What are they? How are they really serving us? Because if I look around, there's so many aspects of this, this life, that have been created by rules that serve people that don't look anything like me or you, or you know a lot of us out here. So I really see it as a as a pathway to creating a new world and a new experience that we want to live in.
Speaker 1:
Mm, hmm, I couldn't agree more. Thank you so much for sharing. I have one last question I want to ask is there anything you want to share about yourself or your journey, before I ask final question.
Speaker 2:
I don't think there's anything else, but I will make kind of like a plea to anyone who finds this to commit to the path of feeling yourself, commit to the path of validating and being in spaces and places that reflect back to you the validity of your own experience, if and just begin to come become aware of how much you reference outside of yourself for how you should be or do in the world and what happens if you just make one small adjustment to honor your own experience today.
Speaker 1:
Mm hmm, Love that. What if you don't make yourself wrong? Mm hmm, Love that so much. Okay, so for women listening who are high achievers, you know, like us, why and maybe they're asking you know why am I like this? It could be having panic attacks or, you know, emotional outbursts or just feeling like she's different. What advice do you have for her if she has these moments where she feels kind of broken?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, okay, oh, there's lots to say, oh, there's so much coming through right now. Okay, the first thing I want to say is number one you are not broken. These are mechanisms that your system has designed to keep you safe and allow you to survive in the best possible way that you could, because you had unmet needs in development. Most likely Like that's just the truth of what it is Yep, it usually comes back to our childhood, and so these symptoms are ultimately the result of a coping mechanism or a survival pattern that was created to help you survive.
Speaker 2:
And in that, can you not make yourself wrong and simply acknowledge that you would like a new way forward? Yes, that's the first thing. The second thing that really is coming through is that it doesn't have to. You don't have to feel this way, it doesn't have to be this way, and the louder these things are showing up for you, the bigger the purpose is on the other side of them. So, when you allow the magnitude like, I really feel this as your soul screaming at you from the inside, trying to get your attention, and can you see the magnitude and the depth and the texture of that cry for help as directly proportionate to the power and the magnitude of your purpose.
Speaker 1:
I love that so much, so much and real quick. It reminds me of a reel that I shared the other day in my stories on Instagram, and I'm not probably not going to get this quite right, but it was basically like, if you're feeling like discontent, this like something's not right here, your soul's trying to get you to move. Listen, and I never felt like at peace, totally. I love NASA, I loved working there, I love the people, the mission, all of it, but something was missing and I didn't feel at peace and there's so many people who have that experience and they push that away, they ignore it and they just continue doing what they're doing. And you have that for a reason.
Speaker 2:
It's guidance.
Speaker 1:
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:
It's such a beautiful barometer to see like there's so many aspects of your life that maybe did feel really good and, you know, on paper made a lot of sense. But if your soul is not in them and there's a difference between the piece of being you know, the contentment of being like complacent, and that there's. There's a difference there, and we know that difference and so, yes, not always meant to feel comfortable.
Speaker 2:
We're not always meant to feel perfectly at peace, but is it because you're not where you need to be or because you're being stretched into something bigger and greater?
Speaker 1:
Yes, yep, exactly, totally resonant. Okay, so for women listening today who are like, oh my gosh, this was amazing. I want to connect with Angelica. What's the best way for people to find you? And just you can share anything else about your business that you'd like to.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, absolutely so. I do use Instagram maybe not as faithfully as one running a business in 2023 slash 2024 should, but you can find me on Instagram at Angelica Ray, and I'm open to conversations in the DMs and all of that good stuff. I love to converse. If you heard something here that really resonates for you, I would love to hear from you in my DM so we can chat a little bit more about it.
Speaker 2:
I offer a embodiment experience called elemental, which is a breath based. It's not even a practice. It's truly a practice that really supports clearing the clutter that mental, emotional, energetic clutter that helps you to feel the truth and reference the truth. So you can find Elemental in the link in my profile, and I usually host group sessions about once a month and those are pay what you want. It's just my way of getting people into themselves and into their body. So please come join that. And then I offer deeper one-on-one mentorship, and that's really where the transformation happens and where we have the opportunity to go into these patterns, to uproot them and to really learn the texture, the sensation of your own soul, so that you can begin to live from that place, and all of the information from that can be found in the link in my profile on Instagram or also by contacting me from my website, angelicaraycom.
Speaker 1:
Thank you so much for sharing, and I'll put links in the show notes as well, so people can just open that up and click right to you and find you with ease. Thank you so much for coming on today. I appreciate you so much.
Speaker 2:
Thank you for having me and I'm so grateful for this beautiful community that you're cultivating and a place for women like us to see each other, feel each other and expand together.
Speaker 1:
Thank you for listening today. If you're ready to heal, so that triggering situations no longer control you and so that you can feel empowered, brave and thrive in any situation, DM me the word brave on Instagram. I'll send you a training where you will learn three of the most common mistakes driven women are making that are keeping them stuck in negative emotions, and what you can do instead.